Works Of Micro-fiction Inspired By Our Spring 2017 Lookbook
It’s difficult to wrap our heads around the fact that crisp, glorious, warm spring days will return. But the fact that they indisputably will is what keeps us going the mornings it feels too cold to breathe. The annual launch of our spring lookbook always seems like a harbinger of all things good and sunny, and it’s just arrived (+ you can pre-order your favorite styles right now). To celebrate, we asked our friend Dayna Evans, writer at New York Magazine’s The Cut, to indulge our obsession with her genius works of micro-fiction—she’s been parodying our lookbooks over at The Cut for a few seasons now and we eagerly wait to literally laugh out loud (we’re talking serious, OMG-so-good belly laugh) every season while reading them. She was kind enough to work her imaginative magic exclusively for us and…well…just read.
For Gwendolyn, it was a point of pride that her father had been in charge of his own auto mechanic shop for 40 years. Despite having studied the Anthropology of Western Massachusetts’s Ant Colonies in college, she paid tribute to him daily by wearing a pair of coveralls that were just like his. Well, with some of her own flourishes, of course.
In her round wicker bag, January carried all kinds of things. She began to list them for the barista at her local coffee shop. “Ceramic plates. Vinyl records. Hats that I accidentally flattened. Frisbees. Large metal coils.” The barista interrupted her. “Miss, are you going to order something? There are people waiting in line behind you.” This is when January realized she had forgotten her wallet.
With a playful smile, Tristan remarked to her boyfriend, Noel, that she had eyes everywhere. “Uh,” he began to say before she stopped him, one finger to his lips. “Everywhere,” she said, turning to walk away. He laughed nervously. “Babe?”
Tara may not have scored a coveted invite to the regular rodeo, but she did manage to make the list at the less-special but just-as-fun Pajama Shirt and Jean Shorts Rodeo in Talladega, Florida. This was nothing to scoff at.
“Vacation is kind of my thing,” Ana Maria said on a job interview. “That’s why I’m wearing this shirt.”
“Wait, wait, before we leave, let me quickly change,” Lorelai said to her sister, disappearing into her closet. She emerged dressed in a button-down shirt that was more than half removed and a cotton miniskirt tied just so. Her sister smiled. “You look cozy.” She paused, trying to find the right words. “But…you know there is three feet of snow outside, right?”
“I don’t mean to be rude,” Sarabeth began, looking in the direction of several of her closest friends. “But your shorts are way too long.” Her friends whispered among themselves for many labored moments, trying to decide if it was worth explaining that their shorts weren’t shorts, but pants. “I’ll tell her,” Dionne said, brave as ever. “Sarabeth—” she began, but Sarabeth cut her off. “My shorts are exactly right.”
Defiantly, Blaise confronted her optometrist. “You see, it is okay to wear white after Memorial Day.” For the fifth year in a row, Blaise’s optometrist had to explain that it was Labor Day she was thinking of. And that she needed to stop bursting in to discuss sartorial decisions without an appointment. “You don’t even wear glasses!”
Because clearly life is better—or, er, funnier?—in our spring collection, shop your favorites right now. Sunny days are on the way, can’t argue with science.